if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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