life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
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I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
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I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
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