i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize