Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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