just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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