I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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