did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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