it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
We need to rekindle our bromance
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I need to sanitize my soul.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize