it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
