The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
