; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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