I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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