You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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