Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
