38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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