he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
