Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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