Come see our sink grown plant.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
