Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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