so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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