Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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