Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
