I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
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