Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
