i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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