He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
