he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
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