i just had sex bonerless
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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