Just fell off a train. Bad.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
