Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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