Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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