wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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