How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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