Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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