I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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