thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
bring money and cleavage
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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