And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
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after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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