I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Panties = found
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
