im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
