Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
