You don't have asthma, your pregnant
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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