I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
