i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
