no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
thus making me awesome and them whores
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
