I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
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