New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize