he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
