The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
40s are totally the cure
Randomize
