Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
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