My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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