I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
You can't motorboat a personality
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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