By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
